Another Schroeder Post

Top of the 6th, 5-0 St Louis, a wild pitch puts Cardinal runners on 2nd and 3rd. The camera shows Macha in the dugout and the following dialog takes place:

Brian: "Macha, wondering what he has to do here."

Bill: "Well, not much he can do. It's not up to him once he fills in that lineup card."

Really, Bill...REALLY? You do know the Brewers moved to the NL, right? Hell, if it's that easy, maybe Kenny can just turn in the lineup card and take a nap for 3 hours. Or perhaps I can take over innings 2-8, that would be fun.

Really, Bill?

Take This Man's Computer Away. Immediately.

This is one of the dumbest things written in a long line of dumb things churned out by the St. Louis newspaper or its online cesspool. Goldy found it, but I'm going to rant on it.

Entitled "Brewers Keep Cubs and Cards Alive", the piece scolds Milwaukee for not burying (his word, not mine) the Cubs and the Cardinals in the division race yet. On June 8. Among the atrocities cited by this fool (I'm told he's called "Gordo"):

• The Brewers blew a late lead at Atlanta Sunday and lost 8-7, missing an opportunity to sweep the punchless Braves.
• Milwaukee opened the season by losing eight of their first 11 games.
• In late May, they lost five of six games during a brief stretch.
• More recently they lost three times in a four-game series at Florida.

Gordo finished his little rant with the following:

Had they avoided such downturns – the bane of every manager’s existence — the Brewers would own this division right now.

Holy hell. Alert! Captain Obvious is speaking! No shit? So if the Brewers would have won every game since the beginning of the season, those other teams in the NL Central would really be in trouble? Really?

In an upset, there was no mention of the shirt un-tucking. But I'm sure he thinks that if the Brewers weren't so darn arrogant they'd be leading the division by 30 games right now.

It's official - St. Louis has the worst sports writers in the world. Perhaps the universe.

Today's Funny...

...is brought to you by Sammy Sosa (via thebiglead.com):

"I will calmly wait for my induction to the Baseball Hall of Fame. Don't I have the numbers to be inducted?"

Green Bay, The Patriots Of The NFC North?

At least, that's what new guard Duke Preston thinks. Don't know if this guy's any good, but he's not afraid to throw out a few solid quotes:

He told Sporting News Radio’s The Monty Show on Tuesday that the Bills “might be grasping at straws.”

“If you look at my four years in Buffalo, we only beat New England one time,” Preston said. “Green Bay has kind of historically been at the top of its division, almost the New England Patriots to speak. So to go another team and another division that kind of is on the upper tier of it instead of trying to claw their way into the upper tier is a cool opportunity.”

Never mind that Buffalo won more games than Green Bay, and that NOBODY (OK, except Pittsburgh) is New England....it's nice to bring in someone who can go mano-a-mano with 'Michael Finley in the quote department. From ProFootballTalk.com

Fun With Commenters

We love to pick on the anonymous brain surgeons who like to share their wit on the internet for all to see. There's a good one in this story about prospect Lorenzo Cain.

First, the context:

Veteran Brewers center fielder Mike Cameron made sure the new guy knew his place.

Cameron swiped a personalized Nike undershirt that belonged to newcomer Lorenzo Cain, a 22-year-old outfielder who has shot toward the top of Milwaukee's prospect list, and paraded it around the big league clubhouse at Maryvale Baseball Park on Thursday morning. The shirt was similar to the one worn by every player, except Cain's was emblazoned in big gold letters with, "LO CAIN," above the word, "MILWAUKEE."

"If this makes you feel like you've been playing for a long time," chided Cameron, who has made due with standard-issue gear, "then by all means, do it."

Then the comment:

D*ck move by Cameron. Hey Cameron , you big league snob. How many teams have you played for in your career? Like a dozen? Acting like your hot stuff. Thats funny. most teams put you on the roster they realize you must need glasses because of your strikeout #'s then ship u off somewhere else. What ... were u gold glove in like 1987 or something? Leave the young guy alone you tard.

Sounds like somebody is a bit scarred from being a frequent victim of wedgies and bubbler rides in grade school...relax chief. And work on your grammar. And your spelling. Hell, just work on not being so dumb.

Bret Bielema Thinks Badger Fans Are Stupid

The 2011 schedule has been finalized with South Dakota juggernaut joining UNLV, Oregon St, and Northern Illinois on the non-conference slate. They miss Ohio St in 2011.

"What I like about the 2011 schedule is that our fans will have the opportunity to see a variety of quality football programs from around the country," Badgers coach Bret Bielema said in a statement. "We're also very excited about the chance to play in a historic venue like Soldier Field (Northern Illinois). The Big Ten schedule is always tough, and we're pleased to have our bye week in the middle of October."

Roy Oswalt = Moron

Of all the ridiculous comments about steroids, Oswalt's might be the most asinine. At least since Big Mac's "I'm not here to talk about the past" in front of congress. When talking about ARod (my dash button suddenly stopped working), Roy said this:

"A-Rod's numbers shouldn't count for anything," Oswalt said in a phone interview with MLB.com. "I feel like he cheated me out of the game."

"The few times we played them, when he got hits, it could have cost me a game," Oswalt said. "It could have cost me money in my contract. He cheated me out of the game and I take it personally, because I've never done [PEDs], haven't done it, and they're cheating me out of the game."

Oooookayyyy. ARod may have cost you money. How about your own shortstop? You know, famed roider Miguel Tejada? How about those RBI's he had when you were on the hill? Should we take those away? And while we're talking about cash, I see you made $11 mil, $13 mil, and $13 mil since 2005. One reason was for helping the Astronauts reach the World Series that year. Remember the other two stud starters on that team, Mr. Oswalt? Roger Clemens and Andy Pettitte.

So those 3 hits (1 bomb, 3 steaks, in 7 AB's) ARod touch you up for may have cost you money....but you're probably fine with the seasons worth of pitching from Clemens and Pettitte that got the 'Stros to the WS. Of course. Oh, and don't worry about all the times Jeff Bagwell drove in runs when you were on the bump either. Yeah, he was clean. Or not.

Brewers Fans - Going Wild About the Wrong Things Again

Well it's official, Cory Provus is the new Jim Powell for the Brewers Radio Network.

And judging from the reaction of the brain surgeons who comment on the Journal Sentinel blog, (some of) the natives aren't happy. Some examples:

pdog1309

Wow good thing we hired a Cub announcer...

strikout

Not happy at all... anyone but a Cubs guy.... once Bob hangs up his mic, I'm done with Brewers radio.

yoshii8

He is a diehard lifelong Cubs fan, I'm not impressed.

Paco Jimenez

This guy is not simply a "former announcer" for the Cubs... he is a die-hard fan of the Cubs. That is what I have a problem with and I'm hoping this is a stop-gap solution to get them through until next off-season when they can bring in an objective announcer, or at least one whose allegiances are tied to an AL team, not a divisional rival.Bad, bad, bad, bad decision by the BRN.

o Cooter o

Who made this decision? Friggin' horrible!! A 30 year old Cub fan?!!! I bet Bob U. is thrilled...

Good Lord people. What are you afraid of, that he's going to spread Cubs cooties through your radio box? It was always horrible when Jim Powell, a lifelong Braves fan, would openly root for the Braves on the air whenever they played Milwaukee.

Thankfully, there were folks with some sanity who chose to comment in response to the general idiocy displayed above. My favorite:

ottokoss

As long as the Brewers win, I don't care if they hire Ronnie Woo Woo, or whatever the hell he's called.

Word.

Start Your Monday With The Worst Article Ever!

Andy Baggot gives us another example of why newspapers are failing. You remember him: He's the guy who said it would be a "profound disappointment" if the Crew missed the World Series after the CC trade, and also for making some stupid comments about the Willie Randolph hire.

Today, he wastes even more paper/cyber space by saying commenters on sports websites are dumb - mean spirited, even.

It's something else entirely to coldly disparage those involved — players, coaches, anyone else close to the scene — in some cases making accusations that have no factual basis. It's what the mean-spirited, the small-minded, the cruel do when they log on, duck behind the curtain of anonymity and unleash their jealous frustrations.

Some can't help but be hurt.

You hear that guys? Stop making mean comments on the JS, Wisconsin SJ, and Green Bay PG articles because you might hurt Doug Melvin or Dom Capers' feelings. Please, I'm sure they can't sleep at night knowing what "Favre4-Ever" and "BeerPongChamp" thinks about them.

More Commenting Fun!

More absurdity from "Brewer Nation" on the JS Blogs. I never read this nonsense, but was looking to hear from people at the Brewers On Deck thing. It quickly turned into a discussion on starting pitching when this gem from "andrew" caught my eye:

"...regardless, sign Pedro Martinez, Mulder, or Benson to a minor league contract and hopefully we can get a comeback player to help down the stretch if needed... high reward low risk."

Riiiiiiight, genius! Like Pedro's gonna sign a minor league deal and ride a Greyhound bus from Nashville to Toledo all summer. There's better odds of the Brewers signing ME to a minor league deal than Pedro.

Complete Loser

Capital Times article about drunk drivers in Dane County. Some douche has 10 - count 'em - 10 DWI's and admits he'll continue to drink and drive. Plenty of, ahem, sobering quotes from this loser, but this is the money line:

"I'm 50. I've been drinking and driving since I was old enough to drive," he said. "That's only one every three or four years."

Yikes!

More JS Commenting Fun!

For some idiotic reason, I thought it was a good idea to read a few comments from this JS Blog post. Yeah, not so much. The post listed the Top 25 best selling NFL jerseys under "The Business of Sports" heading. Mainly, I wanted to see if anybody else thought Chris Cooley was an odd name on the list. Harmless enough, right? It started out fine and got a good chuckle from this one:

"How many did TT have to buy just to get Rodgers on the list?"

Ha, that's pretty good. It got worse....as, of course, a list of jerseys turned into a Favre-Rodgers argument. Eventually, I came to this guy with the clever screen name "pk1fn":

"I don't think 25 is anything to be proud of. The Packer's pro shop revenue is way down since Favre was forced out. I'm sick of this paper and the media touting Rodgers. He had an interception, fumble and couldn't get the team in from the 1 yard line on Sunday and everyone is blaming special teams and the defense. Favre would have been crucified for the interception."

Whoa....let's break this down, super-slow-mo instant replay-style

"I don't think 25 is anything to be proud of." This article wasn't intended to praise Rodgers for cracking the top 25, rather just give the list.

"The Packer's pro shop revenue is way down since Favre was forced out." I have no idea if this is true or not. Searching the interweb says the team stopped reporting Pro Shop income last year. If this guy has inside knowledge (highly doubtful) and this is true, fine. Teams sell more stuff when they are winning. See: the abundance of fresh Brewers hats, shirts, and flags all across Wisconsin this summer. You couldn't go to the grocery store without seeing at least 3 brand-spanking new Brewer lids.

"I'm sick of this paper and the media touting Rodgers." Um, I know you don't want to believe this, but Rodgers is actually pretty good. And I could post dozens and dozens of article ripping Rodgers - it's not all positive.

"He had an interception..." Yes, he did have an interception.

"...a fumble..." Well, if a shotgun snap sailing 6 feet over his head from a concussed center is considered "a fumble," I guess he had one of those too. Ralph Sampson would have struggled to haul that one in.

"...and couldn't get the team in from the 1 yard line on Sunday..." Wow. Maybe if Rodgers handed the ball off better, we would have scored.

"...and everyone is blaming special teams and the defense." At this point, it's clear our friend was watching a different game. San Fran-Buffalo, perhaps?

"Favre would have been crucified for the interception." Chuck got plenty of heat from the media I read/heard. And when did Favre ever get "crucified" for anything? The guy was the best QB in the history of football in the eyes of %99.9 of Packer fans (poll taken last year).


Alas, somebody did mention Cooley: "Anyone else surprised to see Chris Cooley on this list?" I guess these comments were worth reading after all...

Ties, We Don't Need No Stinkin Ties

After his Eagles ended overtime tied with the crappy Bengals, Don McNabb seriously thought they would keep playing. Yes, until yesterday, one of the better QBs of the last decade didn't know regular season games end in ties after overtime. Outstanding!

Link

Come Again?

A tidbit from the Brewers website:

Right-handed reliever Todd Coffey went from a home-improvement project in North Carolina to the pennant race and has been a revelation in the Brewers' bullpen. Working with a 92-95 mph fastball and a biting slider, he has made seven scoreless appearances since Milwaukee claimed him off waivers from Cincinnati. "When it's all said and done, that might be the best acquisition we made all season long," Sveum said.

Dale, Dale, Dale. That's a downright Yostian statement. Ned-like, even.

Darrin Sharper Likes Wine

....or, he is wine. Or, he wants himself in your mouth. Or....ah, screw it, here's the quote:

"I'm like a fine wine, a Cabernet-Merlot-Shiraz blend. It can do a lot of things. It gets better as you open it up and let it get out there and air out, filtrate, do all those things. I don't even need a decanter. Just let me go out there and run. Pour me in your mouth, suck it up and let it run."

Pat Williams - Still Talking Smack

You all saw his earlier quotes about the Week 1 MNF match up. He's still at it, talking abou shutting down Ryan Grant:

Pat Williams admits he and fellow Pro Bowl tackle Kevin Williams have talked about what Grant did when he went for 119 yards and a touchdown on 25 carries.

"That ain't going to happen Monday night [in the opener]," Pat Williams said. "Trust me it ain't going to happen. I've got everybody focused."

Bulletin Board Material

Well...it appears there is one team that can't wait to play the Packers this year...the Vikings on the first Monday Night.

Good Lord, talk about old-fashioned trash talking:

“I’m going to try to crush all of ‘em,” Williams said. “That’s been the focus of my whole summer – the Green Bay Packers.”

“Playing Green Bay on Monday night to start the season – that’s everything you want,” Allen said. “Hopefully, I can put my helmet square in the back of his {Rodgers} spine. If I can do that and knock the ball loose, it’ll be a good day.”

Well...helmet on the back of his spine...that doesn't sound that violent.

Well, it appears the Vikings are this year's "sexy" pick to make some noise in the NFC (I believe last year it was San Fran...and ahem...that didn't work). Whatever...they say our QB might struggle? Take a look at who's in charge of the purple this year. Tavaris Jackson is not taking these clowns anywhere.

Quote of the Week

This quote has it all - a thinly-veiled reference to the Parra/Fielder incident, and Silva referring to himself in the third person AND by his nickname. And his nickname is obscure - it's not like Francisco Rodriguez calling himself K Rod, or Randy Johnson calling himself the Big Unit. Carlos Silva's nickname is Chief? Who knew?

Just fantastic.

From John Donovan's latest column:

"Maybe 'Chief' has to go and grab somebody from his neck and throw him into the wall and something's going to change. I'm very close to doing that, so write that down."

-- Seattle pitcher Carlos "Chief" Silva, on the moribund Mariners

Maybe 'Chief' should grab himself by the neck and throw himself into a wall - he's currently 4-13 with an ERA just shy of 6 and a WHIP of 1.5. All for the low, low price of $8.25 million this year.

And the Mariners are 45-73.

Yeah, I think it's a little late for all of this, Chief.

Favre to Tampa Bay!

Late last night the Tampa Tribune reported that Brett Favre being traded to the Bucs was imminent, most likely within the next 24 hours.

Whatever...again...wake me up when something actually happens. I'm so done with Brett Favre.

Anyway, I spent some time this morning perusing through the comments on the Tampa Tribune post regarding the Favre trade...oh boy were there some dandies:

Farve was over rated and never good as Bart Starr was. Now he can go to Tampa and throw more intercepcions. Packers all the way this year with Aron Rogers! Go Pack go!

Favre to Tampa would be the best addition in years. Get your #4 Jerseys on order. Mr. Favre welcome to Tampa. Think of how many Superbowl rings you would have if you came here in 1999. As a bonus, we’ll even bring Warren Sapp out of retirement.

Brett Favre will bring the kind of excitement to Tampa’s offense for the next couple of years, the likes of which has never been seen in franchise history. If he can improve last year’s offense by 15-20% the Super Bowl is a lock with our defense.

life long favre fan sad to see him go. not as hard now as when he retired but it will be disgusting to see him wearing those terrible uniforms i may just puke on my floor. screw thompson and murphy the clocks ticking now.....

To the fans of the Bucs: take care of our boy! We’ll all be cheering for him (and you). Thanks Brett! We’ll never forget you. I’ll be buying my number 4 jersey as soon as it’s official. Go Bucs!

My flag comes down the min #4 signs with another team. I would hope TB kicks GB’s a** when they play, where can I buy a ticket and a Buc’s Flag?

I’ve been a Packer fan for over 30 years. I have been a die-hard, Packer zealot who thinks of nothing BUT the Pack during football season. My house was decorated mostly in Packer stuff. Today I took all the pennants and posters off the wall, took the bumper stickers off the car, and put all of paraphenelia into storage. Tomorrow, if this report turns out to be true, I am going shopping for Buccaneer T-shirts. I will be a fan of them until Thompson leaves the Packers. I hate him too much to root for the packers anymore (just until he’s gone, of course).

Just like I am a loyal Republican but think losing is good for them because maybe it will cause them to kick out some of the corrupt dead wood in the party, the Packers need to clean house including McCarthy, Thompson and the newest idiot in the trio, Mark Murphy. Where do I buy a #4 Bucs jersey for my son?

Here is my personal favorite:

Favre will make a good backup to Brian Griese.

God I love the internet. Just chalk full of good stuff. So what have we learned today from these fools?
-Bart Starr was better then Brett Favre
-Not only is the Super Bowl a lock for Tampa this year if Favre goes there, but there would have been subsequent Lombardi trophies in the Tampa front office if Favre would have went down there a decade ago.
-If you are a true Republican, you hate Green Bay (ehhh...this one is probably true).

Favre in Tampa Bay? Go ahead Brett. Enjoy yourself. I personally can't wait until week 4 when our defense destroys you (assuming you are even starting at the point).

Darrell Green: Douchebag

Former Skins CB Darrell Green was just inducted into the Hall of Fame. Great player, great player. But, did anybody hear is comment about today's players? He claims there are only 2 current NFLers who are hall of fame worthy. Two? Really? I bet you could pick any NFL season in the last 75, and there would be way more that two HOF's playing that year. No doubt. And when Green says two, I'm guessing he meant Favre and Brady. So, none of the following guys are HOF worthy? Peyton Manning, Ray Lewis, Marvin Harrison, Derrick Brooks, Jason Taylor, LaDanian Tomlinson, Orlando Pace, Walter Jones, Tony Gonzalez, Adam Vinitiari, Randy Moss, etc.... Please