Thursday, January 22, 2009

Fielder Signs, Passes Physical

Milwaukee locked up Big Poppa for 2 years - $18 million. The bigger news is the JS blog title: "Fielder Passed His Physical." Apparently, they didn't test for: Obesity, cholesterol, heart disease, a bad back, bad knees, gluttony, and unknown gastric bypass surgery.

20 comments:

Charlie Marlow said...

Do they test for asshat? Because I'll bet Manny Parra will tell you Fielder has that, too.

AP said...

Maybe they mean he passed the physical, meaning like he didn't take it.

"Prince, you need to take your physical."

"No thanks, I'll pass."

That seems more likely.....

Nubs said...

Looks like Counsell might be back as well. I like it.

garcia said...

I feel there is something else going on... I think Prince will be traded either part way through this year or at the end of the year...

I don't trust the output of $11 mil next year. Something seems amiss...

Goldy said...

I see it as they knew he would be grumpy if it went to a hearing and they called him fat and a terrible first baseman. As much as people rip on the guy, he is a good hitter and the Brewers need him in the lineup. I think this deal works for both sides.

Anonymous said...

$18 mil can go a long way at the Olive Garden salad bar.

And desert at Culver's.

And a snack at the titty bar.

D'Amico's one good year said...

I agree with Garcia... to me this deal feels like a "you'll be a Brewer this year, and we'll trade you next" sort of thing... otherwise, why not sign him for longer?

Also, I guess a BMI check wasn't part of the physical. Bitch tits.

D'Amico's one good year said...

Seriously... when he rounds the bases, it looks like my wifes titties when we jog. I'm waiting for him to miss a game because he gives himself a concussion.


WHAM!

garcia said...

DOGY, I'm sorry for you and your wife if that is the condition of her mams.

Dogy said...

I'M NOT! This particular unit of measure enjoys funbags. You have to love a woman who is toned and taut but still has... stuff. Important stuff!

garcia said...

I just wouldn't want to ever compare my wife's mams to that of a man... The experiment would be to go home and try to compliment your wife by saying that her bouncy juggs look just like Prince Fielder's when he's trying to score from second on a single up the middle...

Let's see if she wants to jam some jelly right then and there or if you become a monk right then and there...

wrigleyville said...

man, i can't imagine saying:

honey, your boobies look like prince fielder's.

Goldy said...

After complimenting your wife that way, presenthe rwith a Chuckie Hacks.com t-shirt. They love it when you give them Chuckie Hacks gear. I think we have a chick shirt for sale.

wrigleyville said...

if her boobies looked like prince's, i don't think the girl shirt would fit.

Ron Burgandy said...

I think she pointed to her boobies!

D'Amico's one good year said...

Now, lets be clear, here... I'm not saying she has floppy, curry-scented man-titties. I'm saying that, because both Man-titties and delicious lady funbags are composed of the same material (fat/skin/nipples), they will often behave in a similar fashion when jostled.

Also, my-ah whife has often heard me compare Mr. Chubbypants' breastage trajectories to that of a well-endowed woman, and she not only agrees, but continues to service me in an eager and adequate if antiquated manner. She has actually offered to help him shop for a sports bra. Denied.

Charlie Marlow said...

"but continues to service me in an eager and adequate if antiquated manner."

ahahahaha

Matt said...

Maybe you should take the next play off, DOGY. Stop talking for a while.

DOGY said...

Yeah... yeah..


Aw, come on, Matt... I'm just joking 'round.

DOGY said...

When all this is over, we should get an apartment together.