Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Welcome Back

Spent the last 17 days doing field work in Lower Michigan. Here’s what I learned about our neighbors to the north…and east.

1) Beer sales end at midnight. Advantage – me.
2) Confederate flag sales remain strong, to quite strong
3) Chris Osgood is a hall of fame goalie. I have zero idea if this is true, or just homer-speak. Hockey fans?
4) At least 87% of all drivers smoke.
5) Canada uses Celsius. I was unknowingly picking up Canadian radio stations and herd “Tonight’s high will be 37 degrees.” I kept thinking “WTF…it’s like 90 out here, no way it’s getting down to 37 tonight.” Yes, I’m an idiot.
6) Other than on interstates, road signs are optional. What’s the speed limit? You choose, apparently. How many miles to the next city? Take a guess.
7) Saginaw is known as “Truck City.” Needless to say, Saginaw is struggling.
8) Kwame Kilpatrick (Detroit’s Mayor) is more hated than Dick Weeks at a grammar convention.
9) The Detroit Lions have absolutely zero buzz in the state. Didn’t see a single Lions hat, T-Shirt, or bumper sticker and didn’t hear anyone mention them in conversation. It was sad, really. By my account, here’s the current sports pecking order in Michigan:
-Red Wings
-U of Michigan
-Michigan State
-Central Michigan
-Ludington High School Orioles
-Detroit Lions


Anonymous said...

Ludington High School football rules!

Krey said...

I enjoyed that Brad, thank you

Krey said...

As far as I am concerned Canada can have Michigan, we should see what we can get in a trade with them.

Anonymous said...

Are you welcoming yourself back?

Anonymous said...

I'd take the CFL for MI

thecobra said...

Don't forget the great Michigan Left Turn. Which entails a right and then a U turn.

Anonymous said...

I am moving to Grand Rapids from Madison in two weeks and lets just say I will probably kill myself within two months. Combine a generally economically depressed area, shit roads, traffic lights hanging from cords, those god damn michigan left turns and the lack of FSN and you have a recipie for disaster. On the bright side at least i will have Big Ten Network though i will only watch it the ten times the b-ball games are on.
Please say a prayer for strength for me.

b. krey said...

We can annex B.C. I believe the northwest corner of B.C. touches Alaska. That way we would have 49 contiguous states. In a strategic move we could also take over Baja California and the Mexican state of Sonora.

garcia said...

hey anonymous...lets get together in two weeks and drink our michigan sorrows away! I've lived in Grand Rapids for 9 years now...you get used to all the a-holes and the pot-holes.