Official Stupid Packer Predictions

Your week 4 starting QB

I did this last season and came up with a 6-10 prediction, upping my original victory total by 3 games. Lets see what I come up with for this season. Note: The season will not really capture my interest until sometime after the Bye Week, after the Brewers close out the World Series.

• Week 1: vs. Vikings- Ugh, it's not so much Rodgers I am worried about but the loss of Wells, a questionable O-line, the fact Grant hasn't played since January, Hawk possibly out, Jones out and Martin up to the third receiver and a new punter in what looks to be a field position game. However as I said last season, "... in the end, Tavarius Jackson will not win you a game." Win
• Week 2: at Lions- The Lions? Really? You just got KC Wolf flattened by the Falcons. Great job. After a bad game 1, Grant gets into the swing of things and has a great game. 2-0 in the division. Win
• Week 3: vs. Cowboys- The Cowboys looked good yesterday. Thankfully Favre won't be on hand to lay his 12th consecutive turd against the Cowboys. However, if still healthy, Rodgers will lay his first turd against the Cowboys. The fact Tony Romo grew up in Burlington will be profiles 79 times this week on Milwaukee tv stations. Loss
• Week 4: at Buccaneers- Seems like a game the Packers should win, but Matt Flynn's NFL debut doesn't go as smoothly as planned. Earnest Graham has a Westbrook-esq all around day. Loss
• Week 5: vs. Falcons- The Falcons are bad. This goes to show you how bad the Lions really are. In what could be the one game this year where the offense looks like they know what they are doing, I am going to call a dominating Win.
• Week 6: at Seattle- This feels like the Bucs game. A game the Packers should win (I think) but I just don't see them getting it done. The pack seemed to get all the bounces last season, but this game just doesn't go our way. Hasselbeck does receive some nice baby shower gifts from the Packers, however. Loss
• Week 7: vs. Colts- I refuse to believe the Colts are as bad as they looked last night. I think the Colts will use the first couple weeks of the season to get there shit together and will begin firing on all cylinders by week 7, not boding well for the Packers. This has the makings of a complete clunker. Loss
• Week 8: Bye-The Bye come at a good point in the schedule. I have them at 3-4. Hopefully they can take that Tampa or Seattle game and flip that record. Hopefully Rodgers still has all his limbs at this point.
• Week 9: at Tennessee- Now that the Brewers have won the World Series, I can pay attention to the Packers. The Packers will win this game. Vince Young is terrible. Chris Johnson looks like he may be legit. Tough battle but hopefully the Packers come out strong following the bye and get some momentum headed into the dump the following week. Win
• Week 10: at Minnesota- Gus Ferotte has rallied the Vikings by this point. Things seem good in Viking-land. However, it is during this game that Adrian Peterson realizes he is 9 games into the season and not injured yet. The turf monster jumps up to bite him and the Packers rally for a victory and the Vikings season heads towards the crapper. A big Win.
• Week 11: vs. Chicago- After 2 straight wins, a lot of buzz headed into this game. Based on last nights game, maybe the Bears are not as bad as we thought. However, I think that was more the Colts playing awful than the Bears looking good. The Bears had the Packers number last year and I think it carries over to this game. The Packers lay a turdburger, which is not as desirable as a furburger. Loss
• Week 12: at Saints- Bush looked like a legit NFL player yesterday. Breese is having a monster year and keeps it going against the Pack. Loss
• Week 13 : vs. Panthers- I said last year that it seems the Packers and panthers play every year. The Packers will win and it will be one of those games when you look back at the season and say, "I don't really remember that game." Win
• Week 14: vs Texans- This could be the feel good game of the year. A cold weather game against a bad team from the south with no running game. I really like Ahman Green and if he is not injured, I hope he wears the right kind of forearm sleeves so that he does not fumble. Win
• Week 15: at Jaguars- I can't really see anything good about this game unless Matt Jones scores a touchdown and starts snorting the goal line. The Jags grind out an easy 21-3 win. Loss
• Week 16: at Bears- Well, at least Favre won't quit in the middle of this game like he did last year. Huge game. Could be for the division title. Don't know what to say here, but if this game is huge for both teams, it could breathe life back into the Packers-Bears rivalry that has been relatively quiet since the Charles Martin days. I'll flip a quarter and it says ... Win
• Week 17: vs Lions- The packers win this one to go 9-7 and pile it on the Lions as they finish the season 0-16. Detroit is finally relieved of the nightmare that is Matt Millen. Win

Well, there you have it 9-7. Will that be good enough to make the playoffs? I think so. But the NFL is crazy. The Bears could be the Packers of last year and and up 13-3. They have the D and thrive on lucky breaks. Its a strange year for the Packers. I have no clue what we will see tonight. I just hope Rodgers makes it through the season in one piece.