Monday, January 19, 2009

It All Adds Up

On Monday, Chicago Cubs General Manager Jim Hendry circulated an internal memorandum to the front office staff to inform employees of a change in the club's preferred courier, from DHL to FedEx.

"In light of the restructuring of DHL's global shipping enterprise, the Chicago Cubs have negotiated a preferred shipping rate with FedEx," Hendry said in the memorandum. "Effective immediately, please utilize FedEx for all of your ground and air shipping needs. The savings that the club will realize from this new partnership with FedEx is exciting for the franchise."

As with each offseason move made by the Cubs, the news of the change in couriers spread quickly to the team's fanbase, all of whom are searching for ulterior motives for the move.

"This has to be related to Peavy, IMHO," said commenter "Cubz4evah2006" on a Chicago Sun-Times message board. "Hendry is freeing up finances to make another run. Make the move Jim!!!!!"

Cubz4evah2006 then went on to list the entire Cubs 25-man roster with Peavy in the fold, and said that now that the Cubs rotation has Peavy it is "just sick."

Other Cubs commenters had similar feelings.

"Peavy is from the South. FedEx is based in Memphis. It fits." affirmed "GraceyRyno", commenting on a blog post on top-25 Cubs blog "BleedCubbieBlue". "DHL is based in like Germany or something."

The FedEx move is the latest in a long line of transactions related to the inevitable acquisition of Jake Peavy from San Diego, which includes the trade for Kevin Gregg, the decision not to re-sign Kerry Wood, the trade of Mark DeRosa, the trade of Felix Pie, the re-signing of Ronny Cedeno, and the free agent acquisition of Milton Bradley.

5 comments:

Brad said...

Please tell me those are not real comments. Please?

wv23 said...

sure, it's not the same as discussing make-believe offers to cc sabathia or the merits of signing elderly closers, but you have to write something in the offseason. i suppose.

Todd said...

So what you're telling me is, "Cubs fans on Chicago newspaper sites make the JSOnline commentators look like budding Nate Silvers?"

wv23 said...

cubs fans on bleedcubbieblue, the trib and cubs.com are a disaster. and there are a lot of them, so it only intensifies the effect.

but it seems matt is mocking me. and for that he will be destroyed. shame. i liked him.

woziszeus said...

Graceyrhino is probably the same guy who knocked out the front teeth of the guy from Stallis before punching out his sister (or something like that).