Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Gilbert Arenas is Great

This is an actual post from Gilbert Arenas' blog:

There Are No Such Thing as Shark Attacks

I know this is random, but I just want to clear this up for people out there.
There are these things called shark attacks, but there is no such thing as a shark attack. I have never seen a real shark attack.
I know you’re making a weird face as you’re reading this. OK people, a shark attack is not what we see on TV and what people portray it as.
We’re humans. We live on land.
Sharks live in water.
So if you’re swimming in the water and a shark bites you, that’s called trespassing. That is called trespassing. That is not a shark attack.
A shark attack is if you’re chilling at home, sitting on your couch, and a shark comes in and bites you; now that’s a shark attack. Now, if you’re chilling in the water, that is called invasion of space. So I have never heard of a shark attack.
When I see on the news where it’s like, “There have been 10 shark attacks,” I’m like, “Hey, for real?! They’re just running around? Sharks are walking now, huh! We live on the land, we don’t live underwater.”

I am stunned. That is just awesome.


Brad said...

WTF did I just read??

Nubs said...

Why were you on Gilbert Arenas' blog?

Anonymous said...

Are you sure you didn't read that on Woz's blog?! I could see woz saying that. Especially being in Portland for a week...a little jet-lag goin on.

Goldy said...

Krey -
Thought the same thing, "that sounds like something Woz would post." However, no matnion of a trip to Silk.

Htiek said...

And there are no such things as muggings...if you just so happen to run into a thug out on the street that is called invasion of turf...and you must pay the price.

Or you can answer a riddle and pass for free.

woziszeus said...

All I can say is...hopefully one day I can be on Gilbert Arenas' blog level...that was one of the best posts I have ever read.